broken heart.

*writer’s note: I wrote this post a very long time ago and never hit “publish.” At the time I wrote it, it felt incomplete.  As I was looking and thinking on words to write today, I came across it again.  And today, it resonated with me.  In light of our city’s loss and the fact that I’ve endured a serious crash course in praying for my enemies, I pray this post speaks to you, in some level or another today as we continue to mourn our city’s loss. 

prayer vigil

They say a broken heart is one of the most powerful forces in the world.

I tend to agree.

See, I believe most people live with an element of a broken heart. Brokenness, so to speak.

No. I don’t think that’s being pessimistic.  I think that’s reality.  Not the bad reality we try to avoid.  But the good kind we make friends with in an effort to appease life and all the curves it will throw at us.  See, I think the nature of humanity in general is a broken heart.  Some of us wear it on our sleeve, for the entire world to see… Some of us deny its existence and tuck deep into deeper crevices of our hearts in an effort to avoid the very brokenness that drives us… Still, some of us keep it, mostly (and quite safely) tucked away but still fully aware of its origin, its impact and its implication.

I’m babbling. I know.

But I had quite a thought this evening. I think that lack of love and broken hearts are the foundation for every problem we desire to solve and every challenge that afflicts our soul.  Hold on.

Let me explain.  Humanity lends us a broken heart.  It is unfortunately, by nature, the world that we have inherited.  It is broken and messy, it is a little bit chaotic and sometimes, if we ‘re honest… it’s filled with pain.  Humanity lends us a broken heart y’all, it’s just what is.  There is an element of brokenness in all of us, a severed tie that leads us and drives us and brings some to the cross and others away from it.  But mostly, it leads us away from each other.

Look around you.  People are mostly eerie of each other instead of friendly with each other.  First instincts have turned from good to bad.  Distrust and guarded lifestyles rule and reign the cultures of this world.  The bottom line is that as people, man we can really hurt each other in an effort to protect ourselves.  Look around you. Again. We are now living in a city marked by a broken man’s desire to get to paradise, to be somebody, to fit in and to attain a semblance of holiness. To do something that mattered. However misguided.

It is important, especially in this season, to be planted in the reality that our inheritance is really not this broken heart and broken world.  But rather our inheritance is a Kingdom and a a life abundant. An entire being filled with the glory of God.  That is our inheritance.  A heart transformed by a love so deep and wide that the earth itself groans in response to it.  A love that no thing, no circumstance could ever quench.  A love that conquers our broken hearts, our broken lives.  And it does more than mend.  It literally transforms until we can’t anymore.

xo, Nicole


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