Guys. This is getting ridiculous.
First off, Hi. I know it’s been a while. Second, I apologize in advance for this post, because I am going to speak a lot of truth as graciously as I can, but the possibility of it hurting is still a little bit high.
Guys. We have GOT to get it together. Like, fix it Jesus, let go and let God together. We are getting a little bit much in the name of Jesus.
Our current culture and generation is operating under this “feelings first” ideology that demands coddling and fuzzy feelings to thrive. This is false and incorrect and absolutely infuriating. Let me explain.
Once upon a time, constructive criticism and accountability was part of every day life. Teachers in school corrected us, coaches corrected us, bosses, coworkers, heck… parents, husbands, wives. Correction was an unquestioned part of life. Nobody loved it, it hardly feels fuzzy wuzzy, but man… it grew us, made us better people and taught us personal responsibility.
NOW, these days… any statement outside of “You’re Great” is considered bullying and mean and irrelevant.
WHAT. THE. WHAT.
Guys. I don’t love hearing that I’m doing something wrong. Legit. I don’t love hearing “Hey, you dropped the ball, kid. This could’ve been better.” I also don’t like seeing that I did a crappy job or could’ve done better or just didn’t know to do better. I don’t like hearing my husband tell me I got it backwards and I need to check myself. It is not a fun feeling. I don’t like owning up to being too sassy and unable to control it at times (working on it) or that I may not actually have all the answers to a problem that frustrates me. I have a right perspective on it, I understand that it’s necessary, but much like going to the dentist, it’s just not something I am going to celebrate… in the moment.
“ Now all discipline seems to be more pain than pleasure at the time, yet later it will produce a transformation of character, bringing a harvest of righteousness and peace to those who yield to it.” (Romans 12:11 TPT)
Let’s do better, let’s be better. Let’s talk about the hard stuff, let’s be honest, in love. I’m not writing a call to arms for jerks to be jerks and allow them to get away with it. But let’s be open and willing to receive praise and correction, accolades and feedback. We’re never going to grow if we don’t. We are getting way too hurt, way too easily and it is a burdensome (and frankly, disturbing) sight.
Recently, someone I work alongside gave some criticism on some elements and responsibilities that fell on me. I was peeved, at first. I won’t lie. It stings, it hurts, it SUCKS. I had my moment, I considered all that he said, and then realized that he didn’t have the full picture from where he was standing. But in that, there were *still* some things he said that showed me, I had room for growth, I could tighten up. I heard his constructive criticism, I didn’t take it personal when he processed information from a different standpoint, and I look for the bit (as in part, not as in teeny) that made me grow as a person. I’m good. He’s good. Our working relationship is good. And we moved on.
Listen to me Millenials (yes, all of us).
Correction, Feedback, Criticism (to an extent) isn’t a dig at who you are, and it does not equate to a lack of love and support*. If anything, it supports the commitment to love and to the relationship (whether professional or personal). It’s good, and right. And it produces the right kind of fruit.
“Fully embrace God’s correction as part of your training, for He is doing what any loving father does for his children. For who has ever heard of a child who never had to be corrected? We all should welcome God’s discipline as the validation of authentic sonship. For if we have never once endured his correction it only proves we are strangers and not sons.” (Hebrews 12:6 TPT)
We will never embrace a full identity as a Son (or daughter) of God if we cannot and will not allow ourselves to be corrected. Let’s start changing the world, by actually growing in our character and allowing godly, loving correction to mold us.
Yes. And Amen
That is all.
*I would like to point out that I am 100% aware that there are individuals who will punish, and abuse in the name of correction. Correction is not punitive nor abusive and if you are in a situation where this is the case, get out and seek help.